Family Narratives

Today we had a lesson in Relief Society that I know will stay with me for a very long time. I enjoyed it so much that right after church, we all sat on me and Lou's bed and talked about it as a family.

Our lesson was on family narratives.  We talked first about how is it that families stay close to each other.  This has been something that has been on my mind for months now.  My family, my family of Lou, Kira and Josh mean the world to me, its easy to be close as my kids are young and all our activities revolve around each other.  I want it to always be that way.  My worries/concerns about having a tight knit family has been with our extended families.

My family all lives in Florida.  I get very envious of families that all live in the same city or state.  I have a hard time that my kids hardly know my parents.  I was very close to my parents growing up, even when I went to BYU. Since being married though and not seeing them very often at all, it has weakened. Overall I have a hard time with long distance relationships.  I want to be closer to my parents because I love them so much but I am really at a loss lately to know how to do that.  Its a relationship that I think is important for me, Lou and the kids.  Listening to the lesson today it was hard thinking about where I am at with closeness to my parents and where I want to be.  My sisters also live in Florida.  Sandi's family moved there about 4 or so years ago and Sharon has lived there for I think around 13 years now.  I love my sisters and feel close to them but again would like to be closer. Sharon and I are able to talk on the phone a lot. I am not really a phone person but talking to Sharon is easy to do. I know that as a Field Family they do a lot to stay close to each other in Florida that we miss out on living in Utah, but as I felt in the lesson, I need to figure that out.

Lou's family its a little different with them. Lou's parents moved to Sandy, Utah five or six years ago.  They travel a lot and are busy a lot but we are fortunate to see them about once a month or more. Its something we'll miss when we move to Boise.  Its been nice to get to know them better.  I want to be closer to Lou's mom but its coming along.  Lou has not been as close to his siblings as I have been to my sisters.  Its something that is important to Lou and something we both want.  Its been a challenge at times fitting in with lou's family but I feel my relationship with his sisters have improved a lot over the last little bit, it makes me happy. Lou is working to become closer with his brothers which makes me happy.  Lou's grandparents also live in Utah. We have loved being close to them. They have always been there for us.  For a long time we didn't have parents and for awhile we didn't have siblings in Utah.  We have always had Lou's Grandma and Grandpa Allen close by, they live in Bountiful. When we would have no place to go for Thanksgiving and Christmas, they always invited us over, they would take us to dinner/lunch once a month when we were in school and when the kids were young.  Family is very important to them, it shows in all their actions.

Today after Sacrament meeting a woman in our ward, who is in her late 90s, but has every whit about her still talked to me.  She told me how much she is going to miss me and our family when we move, how much we have added to the ward (it made me feel really good). She told me about the family reunion they had this week because of her great grandson's wedding. She got tears in her eyes and told me how at her age, family is all that matters.  She said how that should always be the case but how now being where she is at in our life she truly recognizes the importance of family.

Between the last few months thinking about families and today's lesson and Sis. Cannon talking to me. I think Heavenly Father is teaching me or rather reminding me to value our families, to build relationships with them, real relationships not just the because we are family so we have to talk kind of relationships.

One thing that really stood out to me was when the teacher in relief society asked us what our family narratives could be.  I asked the kids (after explaining to them what a narrative was) what are narratives are as a family. This is the list the four of us came up with this afternoon.

1. We are adventurous- Josh

2. We are small- Kira (I loved this one, she loves that we are small in stature all of us and that we are a small family in size, she thinks our family size identifies us, I have to agree, being a family of four is a big part of who we are)

3. We are hikers- lou

4. We are close-knit- Diana

5. We are scientists who love math- Kira

6. We are church goers- Diana

7. We are scripture readers- Lou

8. We are clean- Kira

9. We are gamers- Diana

10. We are loving

11. We are prayerful- Josh

I love our list.  I love that the kids were able to identify us as a family.  I hope we can continue to grow close as a family and always want to be with each other and show each other love.